A Public Service Announcement
BAGGY. NOT SAGGY.
We appreciate volume. We celebrate heft.
We just ask that gravity stays in its lane.
The Manifesto
A philosophical treatise on mass distribution
Let us be clear about what we stand for.
We are pro-baggy. We believe in abundance. In generosity of form. In the kind of magnificent presence that commands attention when entering a room.
Big? Beautiful.
Heavy? Glorious.
Substantial? Chef's kiss.
But there's a sweet spot. That magical zone between baggy and saggy. Where mass meets grace. Where heft meets lift.
"WE CELEBRATE ALL. WE JUST REALLY LOVE THAT FINE LINE."
- The Baggy Not Saggy Creed
Look, gravity comes for us all eventually. We respect the journey. We honor every stage. But if you're currently living in that golden zone of baggy-not-quite-saggy? Enjoy it. Celebrate it. Maybe even show it off a little.
The Spectrum
All beautiful. One is just *chef's kiss*.
Perky
Defying gravity like a boss. Newton is weeping.
Baggy
Generous. Abundant. Still maintaining structural integrity.
Saggy
Gravity has spoken. Still beautiful. Just... further south.
*All configurations valid. We just have a soft spot for that sweet spot.
Core Principles
Size is Celebrated
We don't discriminate based on volume. A-cups to beyond-the-alphabet, all are welcome in our movement. The only requirement? Verticality.
Support is Key
Whether it's emotional, structural, or underwire - we believe in having a strong foundation. Literally.
Gravity is... Inevitable
9.8 m/s² comes for us all. We don't hate it. We just appreciate when things are still putting up a good fight.
Heavy is a Compliment
When someone says "those look heavy," we take it as a badge of honor. The altitude is just bonus points.
Words of Wisdom
"Ask not what your bra can do for you, but what you can do for your bra."
- Someone, Probably
"I came, I saw, I supported."
- Julius Bra-sar
"With great mass comes great responsibility."
- Uncle Ben's Lesser-Known Quote
The Science
Real physics. Fake concern.
F = m × g
Where F = Force of Sag
m (mass) = The good stuff. The more the merrier. We're not here to judge mass.
g (gravity) = The villain of our story. 9.8 m/s² of constant betrayal.
F (force) = What we're fighting against. The downward pull. The enemy.
The Solution: You can't reduce g (unless you move to the moon). You shouldn't reduce m (that's the good part). So you must counteract F with superior engineering.
Join the Movement
We celebrate every cup size, every shape, every altitude. But that sweet spot between baggy and saggy? That's where the magic lives.
*This has been a public service announcement from the Baggy Not Saggy Foundation. We are not a real organization. Please don't sue us.
100%
Pro-Baggy
0%
Pro-Saggy
9.8
m/s² of Betrayal
∞
Appreciation